South Park Margaritaville

Southpark Season 13 Episode 1303 -

Margaritaville Allusion to the life of Jesus

Kyle – Jesus
Randy – The system
Cartman – Judas
Other kids – Apostles
Stan – kid trying to return the margaritaville that his dad bought it on a payment plan set up by a finance company that got investors from Wall Street who combined it into securities sold to the banks who transferred it to the US finance deparment.

————————————————————————————————————————————— Stan: Mom, Dad, how come there’s suddenly no money?

Randy: I’ll tell you what happened, son! See, there’s a bunch o’ idiots out there who weren’t happy with what they had! They wanted a bigger house and materialistic things that they didn’t even need. People with no money who got loans to buy frivolous things they had no business buying. And these assholes just blindly started buying any stupid thing that looked appealing, ’cause they thought money was endless! meaning less money coming in. And the idiots couldn’t see that by doing all this frivolous spending they were mocking the Economy. And they made the Economy very angry. We’re all feeling the Economy’s vengeance because of materialistic heathens who did stupid things with their money! Do you understand, son? —————————————————————————————————————————————

Orator 1 – And so why is our economy failing us? Because the government kept interest rates too low for too long! The government took our economy for granted and now we are all here paying the price! How long will we sit and watch our economy just-? As the people we must…

Orator 2 – An angel came to me And so I say to you: Do not listen to the Wall Street brokers! For they… are the ones that put us in this situation! Fat cats with corporate greed! They are the ones who knowingly drove us down this pathway of doom! Our responsibility is…..

Cartman – And where has all the money gone? It must have gone somewhere! The answer is obvious, my friends! It is the Jews! Covetous Jews who have taken all our money and hoarded it for themselves! Hidden all the cash in some… secret Jew cave that they built, probably back in the early 60s! It is the Jews, my friends,…… (yeah…I agree…it’s their fault….jews…)

Randy (Allusion – The system) – There are different people casting all different kinds of blame from person to person. But the fault lies in all of you! YOU, who bought that three hundred thousand house when you only had twenty thousand to put down? YOU, who bought that third car, even though only two people in your home drive! It is time to stop pointing fingers! Fingerpointing gets us nowhere! Steve! We have mocked our Economy. And now the Economy has cast its vengeance on us all! We have become lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of the Economy! There are those who will say that the Economy has forsaken us! Nay! You have forsaken the Economy!! And now you know the Economy’s wrath! O thoust can shop at a sporting goods store, but knowest thou that the Economy will take away thy Broncos’ cap from thine head! Mock the Economy without fear! Thine own stockbrokers… now lie dead by their own hand and thou knowest that thy stockbrokers did not fear the Economy! Well here we are, my friends! You have brought the Economy’s vengeance upon yourselves!

Cartman – I had a dream last night. I was in a field, and I had Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars right next to me. But then the sky went black and …Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars just… melted in my hand. —————————————————————————————————————————————- Kyle (Allusion – Jesus): Listen, this is all you need to know: the economy is not a supernatural all-knowing entity. The economy is just an idea, made up by people, thousands of years ago. The economy is not real. And yet, it is real. Nowadays they’ll give credit to preactically anyone who applies for them. I applied for this yesterday to prove a point. It is an American Express Platinum card. It has no spending limit. Do not be afraid! This is only plastic. It’s just something made up by people. Truly meaningless and still we put our faith in it. Faith is what makes an economy exist. Without faith, it is only plastic cards and paper money.

Cartman (Allusion – Judas) – Did somebody say “catch a Jew”? The person you’re after might be hard to get, but I can bring him to you. And all I want in return… is Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars for handheld Nintendo DS. Kyle paying for everyone’s debt like Jesus sacrificed his life for us.

Man 13: It’s a miracle.
Man 14: Why would someone do this?
Randy: What is this?? What’s going on??
Steven: There! Look! It’s the Jew. Somehow he got a platinum AmEx with no spending limit.
Randy: What’s he doing?
Steven: He’s… paying for everyone’s debts.
Darryl Weathers: Hey thanks, kid, this is really nice of you.
Randy: But that’s… impossible. Why would he do this?
Man 15: So that people will have money to spend.
Sheila: Kyle, you have to stop this!
Kyle: It’s okay,
Ma. Sheila: Noho Kyle, you’ll be in debt for the rest of your life!Please, somebody, get him to stohohop!

Randy the Hypocrite….
Randy: Uh there’s about seventeen thousand dollars’ worth here. Kyle: Heunh. Man 16: He paid for our debts so we could spend once more.
Man 17: He’s dead.

Dr. Doctor: No, he’s just passed out. We should get him to bed. [several men raise Kyle over their heads and gently carry him home. Sheila sobs and follows them. They all go through the living room, up the stairs, into Kyle's room, and lay him down. Sheila waits as the men leave, then leaves and closes the door so Kyle can recover in peace. Beams of light enter through the window]

Anchor: Are we out of the woods yet? Only time will tell. But we must not forget the sacrifice one person made to restore our faith and make us believe in the economy once again. The person we must thank every day for his amazing sacrifice. Barack Obama.
Kyle: [on the sofa watching the TV] Aww, come on!!